Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize
