It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Randomize