Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Randomize