Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
Randomize
