We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
Randomize
