I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
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