I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
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