He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Randomize
