After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
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