You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
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