Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
I still have a little drunk in my system
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
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