ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Randomize
