I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
I like to think it a success when the cops are called
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
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