You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
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