It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
Randomize
