you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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