lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
Randomize
