he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
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