I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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