yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Randomize
