Already got asked if we're dating
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
Congratulations! We have a period
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
His nipple licking is glorious
Randomize
