margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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