Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
Randomize
