so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
so much tequila, so little girl.
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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