Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize
