he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
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