If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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