It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize