He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Randomize
