She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
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