4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Randomize
