So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
Boobs speak an international language.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
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