go do what you do best...puke behind churches
I think I just saw someone hide a body.
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
