FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
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