We're like a lot better than the average bears
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
Randomize
