did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
Randomize
