thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
