I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
Randomize