Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
Randomize
