69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize
