Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
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