it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
Randomize
