I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
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