Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
life is too short to starve
life is also too short to be fat
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
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