I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
I woke up this morning with "guy in polar bear j.crew boxers" written on my stomach along with a 5 digit phone number...
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
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