I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
Randomize