she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Randomize
