Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
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