So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize