I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
Randomize
