i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
Randomize
